Dear Allison,

After seeing a commercial from Google, that inspired me to write to my daughter, Allison Ton.

Dear Allison,

I'm at work thinking about you. I'm worried that you're not getting enough to eat since its so hard to get you to drink 3 oz of milk at nearly 5 months old. Every meal is like a wrestling match, stopping your hands and feet from flying every where.

I constantly think of you when I'm not with you. I wondered is it normal or healthy. When you're asleep, I watch you sleep and it brings so much inner peace and it makes my worries all go away. I wanted to bring you to work everyday if I can.

You also make me wanted to work harder so I can make your life easier when you grow up. But I also don't want to work as much because you're growing up right before my eyes and I don't want to blink or I'll miss out on your first of anything.

You laugh hysterically when I told you your fart stinks. You cry when you know I'm mad when you poop so much that it got all the way up to your neck and I don't know where to start cleaning. You start eating from the spoon at 4 months old. You love rice cereal mix with pear sauce.

You love to roll over and hang out for a bit before you go to sleep. You just discovered your toes and you love sucking on it. I put you out on the jumper and bounce for 15 minutes or so to worn you out so you can fall asleep faster. You love watching TV, therefore, I don't watch TV anymore.

This will be one of many, many letter that I'll be writing to you. I hope when you grow up, this site will still be up for you to read.

Love,

MOM

5/5/11

For my 31st birthday, Calvin took our little family to Reno for two days. I don't really need to do anything, really. Because I felt like the I've the most perfect gift for life; a healthy daughter with all 10 fingers.

The only thing I wish for is to lose that extra 30 pounds I'd gained during pregnancy that I still couldn't get rid off. In fact, I've gained a few pounds because Allison has been treating me so well. She sleeps for 10-12 hours every night since 3 weeks old.

Allison Ka-Hei Ton 02/27/11

It was Sat.night 2/26/11 around 5pm, I felt water tingling down from my vajayjay. Calvin was home at that time, getting ready for work. I told him that I think my water broke and assured him that its fine and told him to go to work anyways. Then, I head to Mi pueblo to buy me a spicy pork burrito and iced cold papaya drink. I also had my eyebrow and underarm waxed. That was all in my to-do list before I go into labor and I have to get it done no matter what. Got home by 8, took a shower and as more water leaked out, I started to panic. Called Kaiser, and they told me to come in check if its urine or water. Call calvin at work and he didn't come home til 10. With no contractions so I wasn't at all in pain, and in my mind, I thought it was a false alarm. Got to the hospital, find out that in fact my water did broke and they wanted to give me proticin immediately since my water broke since five and still have no contractions. Calvin wanted to wait out and feel confident that the contractions will come. By 3am, the dr order the medication for contractions, by 4 am, I was starting to feel the pain coming stronger and longer. By 7am, with no end in sight, I was so exhausted that the midwife told me to get the epidural. I agreed since I wasn't in the mind set to make any decision on my own anymore. Within ten minutes of injecting the epidural, I slept through the rest of the morning til 11am. Doc came in to check and I was 10 cm dilated and I was ready to push. Two hours later and all the dr sees is the baby's dark hair moving in and out. With no feeling from the waist down, I have no idea what im pushig plus I couldn't hold my breath long enough to push. By then, there was at least 10 medical staff in the labor room. They bought the the vaccum and suck the baby out. With one last push, the baby finally came out. It was so surreal. I was in a daze. It was life and death in a matter of a split minute. The nightmare was finally over. They put the baby on me, she looks black and blue and no sound came out. I started to cry hysterically! I thought it was a still birth. I was so frightened and a million things run through my mind. After the pediatrician took her and slapped her a few times, she started to cry a bit but not a lot. They whisked her away immediately because she has a fever because I had a fever. For the next three days, we stayed at the hospital. The baby was at the nicu. The first two days, I was jealous because calvin was with the baby all the time. I don't feel the connection at all. I was in withdrawal. I just wanted to be by myself and healed up my stitches and get my temperature down. By the third day, the baby gets to stay with me. Thats when my mother instinct starts to kick in. One look at her, it was love at first sight. Its like my high school crush but times 100. Its so strong and the bond is so addicting!! I can't get enough of her. Now, I dreaded going back to work. I know ill miss her alot at work. This is feeling is so weird and its so hard to described. It makes wanna do it all over again even when its so painful. When I see her, all of the pain and suffering disappeared. I just wish she'll stay small and attached to you instead of growing up so fast and leave you. I wonder if she ever know the love I have for her.

June 2010

Last year today, we weren't even thinking about starting a family since we were so busy working. The picture is kind of blurry, but that was taking in June of last year. The home pregnancy test confirmed that I was pregnant and the ob/gyn confirmed that I was already 4 weeks along. We're so excited and nine months fly by so fast that I wish I have a time travel machine and turn back time and have her in my stomach kicking and elbowing and feeling her hiccups all over again. I don't even mind all those morning sickness.

Janet & Ay 10/07/10

Wow, my baby sister got hitched last year and got pregnant a month later at their honeymoon. Our kids will be less than five months apart. My parents will have two grandkids in less than one year! So super duper excited for my sister and brother in law.
She was a beautiful bride. Her lavish wedding dress compliments her slim figure nicely!

Seattle, Washington

For Thanksgiving, Calvin and I flew to Seattle for two days. I was six months along with our first child, so that's the best excuse for me not to work during the holiday. Seattle was beautiful, including their snowy weather. Calvin went there before, so we're able to navigated the city fairly well. We went to Chinatown of course for dim sum. Pike Market Place, went to the downtown, watch the tree lighting ceremony. One bizzare thing at downtown was that all these people holding signs that said, "BUY MORE THINGS." I guess that's their clever way of stimulating the economy. It was short and sweet. Some alone time with the husband before our life will never be the same again. In a butterflies and rainbow way!
The picture above is at a Japanese Market in Chinatown. The wine looks so yummy!!

Never Again

I Can't believe girls like that still in existence. Or maybe I've been in hibernation mode too long. This girl was all BeBe out, full blown hair with perfect curls, plenty of makeup, big Gucci bag, perfect nails and expensive shoes but yet expect guys to pay for her share of the dinner. Everything is fine except the guy who's paying for her share took out $40 for him and for her share. Come on buddy. Food and non stop alcohol flowing for $20/person?!? Where are you from? China?!? When we told him its actually $40 per person, he said,"wow, so expensive!' But in Chinese so his female friend wont understand. Also amazes me how a girl can spend so much money on herself but unwilling to pay out $40 for dinner for a friends bday. Or I have a better idea, bring a more generous date.

I'm extremely......

Uncomfortable and extra bitchy lately!!!!

FML

Like any holidays of the year, I was working on Christmas. A family of four ate $40 and left me a $2 tips. I always give good customer service. FML